Monday, December 27, 2010

day 4

Day 1 - Something you hate about yourself
Day 2 - Something you love about yourself
Day 3 - Something you have to forgive yourself for
Day 4 - Something you have to forgive someone for
Day 5 - Something you hope to do in your life
Day 6 - Something you hope you never have to do
Day 7 - Someone who has made your life worth living for
Day 8 - Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit
Day 9 - Someone you didn't want to let go, but just drifted
Day 10 - Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn't know
Day 11 - Something people seem to compliment you the most on
Day 12 - Something you never get compliments on
Day 13 - A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 - A hero that has let you down. (write a letter).
Day 15 - Something or someone you couldn't live without, because you've tried living without it.
Day 16 - Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 - A book you've read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 - Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 - What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 - (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 - Something you wish you hadn't done in your life.
Day 23 - Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 - Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 - The reason you believe you're still alive today.
Day 26 - Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 - What's the best thing going for your right now?
Day 28 - What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 - Something you  hope to change about yourself and why.
Day 30 - A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.

I have been thinking about this "Day of Truth" for a really long time - actually, since Day 3. Honestly, I can't really think of something that I need to forgive someone for. There are a lot of things that people have done in my life that have upset me, and I will be the first to admit that, in the past, I may have held some pretty bad grudges, but I also think that I've gotten a lot better at that. 

I'm not really upset/frustrated with anybody right now (besides my mom - but that doesn't have to do with any sort of forgiveness thing, that's just how we are), and even if I am still hurt by something that someone has done to me, that hurt will not go away so easy - only time will heal it. There are people from my past who have said and done some pretty awful things to me, and I am still angry, but I don't think they deserve my forgiveness; at least not yet. 

A quote from a Dixie Chicks song comes to mind - "Forgive, sounds good. Forget, I'm not sure I could. They say time heals everything, but I'm still waiting." 

I'm in a pretty good spot with my grudges/frustrations right now. I've been relatively happy lately (which is definitely a good thing - and feels like a nice change of pace), and any frustration or anger doesn't really have to do with other people, it has to do with me sorting out my own issues and mostly forgiving myself and learning how to live the life I want to live. 

So until I can think of something that I'm holding against some other person, or come up with something that I need to forgive someone else for, I will leave it at that. 

No forgiveness, just letting go and moving on.

1 comment:

Nikol Schiller said...

in love with that dixie chicks song.
pretty post, as always.