Thursday, February 28, 2008

I never thought I'd say this...

(This was written as an assignment for my Writing for the Media class)

I knew that college was going to be tough, but I never knew it was going to be this tough. Throughout high school, I was the girl who was naturally smart but didn't apply herself. My mom always pushed me to do better. She'd always tell me to take more AP classes, and she was never satisfied when I got a low grade on a test or paper. I always thought that as just her being disappointed in me. After all, both my parents went to Ivy League schools, and my mom never got a B until college. Those are some tough shoes to fill.

Looking back, though, I’m thinking that maybe my mom was right. Actually, I know she was right. Yesterday, I had an epiphany about my life as a college student. I realized that I spend most of my time sitting in a desk chair in front of my laptop. Part of this comes from the fact that my 11x13 dorm room houses three 19-year-old girls and there's no where else to sit, or that Facebook is such a compelling distraction. The main reason, though, that I sit in front of my computer, is the fact that my workload is more than I’ve ever had before. Or at least more than I ever realized I had.

Yesterday, I realized that if I’d had the same study habits I do now back in high school, my grades would have been completely different. I always fought the system, thinking that my 3.8 cumulative GPA was good enough and that I couldn’t do any better. What I didn’t realize was that I was just being lazy. I didn’t study for tests the way I do now. I didn’t spend the time on my papers, math problems, and science homework that I do now. That was my major downfall in high school, my unwillingness to study.

I used to resent my parents for being disappointed in me for my grades. Or for saying, “come on, you can do better!” I never believed them. Even though I ended up at a great university, I still wish I had done better.

I never thought I’d say this, but I wish I had listened to my mom more. She was right.