This week is crazy. I have finals, have to move out of my house and into the storage unit, plus drive home all in time to watch my little sister graduate from high school (yes, my life is a constant flow of graduation ceremonies).
My theatre final was this morning and all I have to say is that I am so glad I am done with that class... and hopefully I passed it. I have two more presentations today as well as another final from 7-10 tonight. Then another one tomorrow morning from 10-1, plus work, packing, and moving after that.
Anyway, I have a short break between finals right now and my brain can't handle any more studying for the time being (although I will probably revise the paper from hell that I had to write for my global journalism class in a few minutes), so I am checking e-mail, running errands (aka picking up my pay check), and drinking a much deserved/necessary grande soy latte.
In the midst of all this, I checked my e-mail and had a message from the one and only wonderful Dr. S with a link to a hilarious Craigslist ad. Maybe I think it is so funny because I am dilerious and my brain is basically educational mush right now, but in any case, I laughed. Outloud. In the middle of the student union. Amongst all other students who are pretending to study when we really know they can't bear to look at their notebooks anymore. Anyway here is what the text of the ad said. Happy reading! (And here's hoping your week is semi less stressful than mine!)
I have a great opportunity arising for the adventurous soul. I have developed a nuclear powered-170 foot submarine with the ability to stay submerged for one year at a time. The purpose of this amazing engineering marvel is to explore deep-sea trenches in search for Mer-people. The crew will consist of 50 deck hands, 3 cooks, 4 doctors, 5 engineers, and 3 teachers.
The applicant must be able to stand high pressures as I've failed to develop a proper pressure regulator. The applicant must be sufficient in History as this will be the only subject taught. Don't ask me why, I'm not in charge of education.
So more about where you will be living and working; the craft as I stated is nuclear powered. The plutonium waste was donated to my cause from the Diablo Canyon nuclear power plant. Radiation will be fairly low for most the sub, except the kitchen which will experience about 20 rads/sec for unexplained reasons. But hey, you're not the cook so no worries!
You will have your own 10x6 room. The 10 is in inches. You have TV and a on-suite toilet. The toilet has been provided by Gatorade (ie bottles). Don't worry, you'll soon love this lifestyle!
The classroom has seating for 30 and is positioned right above the kitchen. Now that I think about it, that puts you at risk of 20 rad/sec radiation too. But not to worry, you'll only work 8 hours a day there.
If you're curious about seeing the submarine before applying; it's currently on a boat trailer out on my street connected to my Ford Ranger. I have converted my Ranger to run off nuclear energy too, giving it sufficient pulling power to get this 170 foot beast to the docks.
Email me for inquiries.
Thank you have a wonderful day!
-Jimmy (Captain, lead engineer, doctor)