sunrise

Have you ever started your day at a different time than usual? It makes you see the world in a whole different way. Like, this morning I realized that the world looks extremely different at 6:45 vs. 8:45 in the morning. 

I live in California which means that we are known for our sunsets (you know, the whole rise in the east, set in the west thing)... although our sunrises, as I learned today, are also pretty wonderful.

The sunrise was definitely beautiful (even though I only saw it while I was still waking up, from the window of the No. 4 bus.. and then from the conference room at work), however next time I see the sunrise, I'd like it to be something romantic... or at least by choice. 

Photo via Flickr

P.S. I'm getting sick so I am going to bed like... now (I know, it's only 9:30, don't judge me). I have to be well rested because we have a Farmers Market booth for the Love Out Loud Campaign tomorrow night, and then we have a big fundraiser at Applebees on Saturday morning.

I don't have time to be sick.

day 6

Day 1 - Something you hate about yourself

Day 2 - Something you love about yourself

Day 3 - Something you have to forgive yourself for

Day 4 - Something you have to forgive someone for

Day 5 - Something you hope to do in your life

Day 6 - Something you hope you never have to do

Day 7 - Someone who has made your life worth living for

Day 8 - Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit

Day 9 - Someone you didn't want to let go, but just drifted

Day 10 - Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn't know

Day 11 - Something people seem to compliment you the most on

Day 12 - Something you never get compliments on

Day 13 - A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)

Day 14 - A hero that has let you down. (write a letter).

Day 15 - Something or someone you couldn't live without, because you've tried living without it.

Day 16 - Someone or something you definitely could live without.

Day 17 - A book you've read that changed your views on something.

Day 18 - Your views on gay marriage.

Day 19 - What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?

Day 20 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.

Day 21 - (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?

Day 22 - Something you wish you hadn't done in your life.

Day 23 - Something you wish you had done in your life.

Day 24 - Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)

Day 25 - The reason you believe you're still alive today.

Day 26 - Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?

Day 27 - What's the best thing going for your right now?

Day 28 - What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?

Day 29 - Something you  hope to change about yourself and why.

Day 30 - A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.

The one thing that keeps coming back to my mind whenever I think of a question like this is: I hope I never have to bury a child. 

I know that sounds so morbid, but it's true. I think there is probably nothing sadder than a parent burying their child - it doesn't matter whether the child is a newborn, seventeen, or forty three - a parent should never have to bury their child. 

Part of it has to do with the fact that it is so sad when children pass away - they have so much more life in them and so many more things that they should experience. But the other part is just that it is just so sad. You go into parenthood believing that you are going to watch your children grow up, raise them into beautiful people, and then at the end of your very long and happy life, they (along with their families) will bury you - not the other way around.

So I hope I never have to bury a child. I'm sure you all would agree.

(This was also Krysten's from After I Do, but I promise it had nothing to do with her post. It is something that I came up with on my own - but I do find it sad that we both, along with many other people, fear this occurrence in our lives.)

Additional Note: Every single day I check the news right when I wake up and right before I go to sleep (and multiple times in between... I'm a journalism student for goodness sake). This article that I just came across on my nighttime news check is pretty closely related to the post I put up a few minutes ago. Instead of writing a new post, I figured I would just share it here. 


Click here to read the beautiful and heart warming story of a pilot who showed such compassion to one of his passengers. You might want to bring tissues. (Also, if you want the ABC news version, click here)


The story is so sad, yet it also gives me faith for humanity - that when there are such creeps in the world (like a boyfriend who kills his significant other's child), there are also AMAZING people out there who might come through for you when you need it most (such as the pilot who delayed his flight for the grandfather of the small child). 

the senior project... finally!!!

I know I have been talking about my Senior Project for a really really long time. It has come up in posts that it really has nothing to do with, I dream about it at night, I breathe it in and out every single breath, it is basically all consuming. But this is the post I am going to actually tell you what I'm working on. I know it is a long post and it is an intense topic, but please read through it. The project is really meaningful to me and it is a very important topic that has become relatively taboo in our society. Please take the ten minutes out of your day to consider what I have to say, and stick with me throughout the rest of my time working on the project because chances are, I will be blogging about this a lot.

The background: Long story short, Senior Project is something that looms over every single Cal Poly student's head every day of their time at the university. It is a project that every single student has to do before they graduate. The project has specific guidelines which must be followed (such as writing a research paper and/or conducting a practical project - but I won't get into all those details unless you ask) in order to make it valid.  The project will then be published and available at the Cal Poly library forever.

**Intro to my project: Instead of doing a research paper or working with a local organization/business that I had no personal connection to, I wanted to base my project off of something that really mattered to me and hit close to my heart. I was very fortunate to stumble upon a group of girls who had just begun to work on a project that fit what I wanted to do perfectly. It just so happened that I needed to start my senior project, and they needed someone to do public relations (which is what I will - hopefully - do when I graduate). The project I will be working on for the next four months is called the Love Out Loud Campaign which is a depression, self-harm, and suicide prevention campaign. I will be the public relations director for the campaign.

**Project Overview: The Love Out Loud Campaign aims to encourage communication and self-expression in order to work through depression and suicidal thoughts. The campaign wishes to create a safe environment where students and other community members feel safe to share their personal struggles, thoughts, and experiences. Through the campaign, we hope to educate, inform, and transform the Cal Poly campus into one that is knowledgeable, tolerant, and supportive in regards to depression; a campus which doesn't simply accept what they have heard about the subject, but one which changes the perceived norms of depression and suicide. Though this begins with Cal Poly, our hope is to create a larger community that reaches out and touches the hearts of anyone who either deals with these matters personally or has experienced them with friends, family members, co-workers, or any other person in their lives. By opening communication and encouraging creative outlets, the Love Out Loud campaign will help those who may feel hopeless or alone to find and establish a foundation of safety and love.

**In order to promote the campaign we will host an event which will include a benefit concert and awareness fair. The event will take place on Saturday, February 26 and will begin late afternoon with an awareness fair featuring student clubs, support groups, and the different health services which are available not only on campus, but also in the surrounding San Luis Obispo community. Different student groups, performers, and artists will be showcasing their work throughout the awareness fair and during the concert. The concert will be a combination of speakers, performers, and bands who feel strongly about the topic of depression. Our keynote speaker is Kevin Hines, a man who jumped off the Golden Gate bridge and survived with full mobility. In addition to Mr. Hines, we will also be hosting different bands, student performers, and speakers who have personal connections with the topic.

That is the basic overview of it. I just had to write this to get it out there and make sure that I blogged about all the overview-details before I got into the other little, more specific things. 

So now you know what I'm working on - it is a suicide, self-harm, and depression campaign. Let me know if you have any further questions or if you want to contribute to the cause or attend the event. Of course I will be blogging about it more, but this was the first step that I have been fighting against for a very long time. Why you ask? Well because I thought it was going to take a lot longer than it did to write the post. Yup, that's it. I'm done. 

Please let me know any thoughts you have on the topic, or if you have any advice/ideas/comments/whatever else you want. Also, please check us out at our website and on Facebook (you can become a fan). Any feedback would be absolutely amazing. I love hearing from you. Also, if you want to help us out by posting information on your blog or website, we would love any support and/or publicity you can give us. Every little bit helps - even emotional support and keeping us in your thoughts and prayers. 

Website: www.loveoutloudcampaign.com

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/TheLoveOutLoudCampaign

**This part was written for my professional website at rachelegan.weebly.com as my senior project overview. That's why it is a little more formal. There was really no point in re-writing it again if I was basically going to be saying the exact same info. 

day 5

Day 1 - Something you hate about yourself

Day 2 - Something you love about yourself

Day 3 - Something you have to forgive yourself for

Day 4 - Something you have to forgive someone for

Day 5 - Something you hope to do in your life

Day 6 - Something you hope you never have to do

Day 7 - Someone who has made your life worth living for

Day 8 - Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit

Day 9 - Someone you didn't want to let go, but just drifted

Day 10 - Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn't know

Day 11 - Something people seem to compliment you the most on

Day 12 - Something you never get compliments on

Day 13 - A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)

Day 14 - A hero that has let you down. (write a letter).

Day 15 - Something or someone you couldn't live without, because you've tried living without it.

Day 16 - Someone or something you definitely could live without.

Day 17 - A book you've read that changed your views on something.

Day 18 - Your views on gay marriage.

Day 19 - What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?

Day 20 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.

Day 21 - (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?

Day 22 - Something you wish you hadn't done in your life.

Day 23 - Something you wish you had done in your life.

Day 24 - Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)

Day 25 - The reason you believe you're still alive today.

Day 26 - Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?

Day 27 - What's the best thing going for your right now?

Day 28 - What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?

Day 29 - Something you  hope to change about yourself and why.

Day 30 - A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.

I could sit here and tell you how the thing that I want to do more than anything in my life is to be truly happy. That I want to find a job I love, a man who loves me and vice versa, have a family of my own, and neighbors that I get along with and who's kids play with mine. That would all be true, but where's the fun in that?

Instead, I will tell you about one of my dreams. I have always wanted to be able to dance really well. It doesn't matter what kind of dance - ballet, ballroom, break, square, "club" - whatever, I just want to be good at it. (And by "club" I guess I mean being able to go to a club or a bar or a party and dance with my friends without feeling extremely awkward.)

Of course, I will never become a great/professional dancer at any of those types of dance, but like I said, it has always been something that I wanted to do. I took some dance classes in high school, they were like jazz/contemporary, but I wasn't very good at it. I think I'm too self conscious to actually enroll in a dance class now, but maybe once I get over that (which I will do... eventually) I will enroll in a class at a local gym or dance studio.

So that's what I hope I will do in my life. I hope I will be able to dance. (And the happiness, good job, loving family, great neighbors, and wonderful children thing would be cool too... just saying.)

new idea for resolution making

Happy New Year! I hope you had a wonderful time ringing in 2011!

If you red my blog on a regular basis, you have probably noticed that I use a lot of ideas from other people's blogs. I read their entries, save the posts/ideas I like, and use those things to my advantage. One of the blogs I read, "After I Do" by Krysten (you may have seen some of her ideas in a couple of my other posts - I highly recommend reading her blog), started a "101 in 1001" list a while ago. It is a list of 101 things to do in 1001 days. That  I loved this idea, so I am starting my own... TODAY.

Because my  new year's resolutions never really work for me (I always give up, or forget about them, or stop doing them for one reason or another) I figured I would come up with a 101 in 1001 list. My list consists of things that I think will make my life better, make me a stronger person, or just things that I want to accomplish. I am starting today, January 1, 2011 which means that I should have everything on this list completed by September 27, 2013. My blog will track my accomplishments, and every time I finish something on the list, I will cross it off and put the date it was completed (See Krysten's for an example).

Without further adieu, here is my list (thus far...):

1. Finish my 101 in 1001 list
2. Read at least one book for pleasure every month for a year
3. Read books from the New York Times Best Seller list and Oprah's Book Club
4. Visit important sites from WWII in Europe, including Concentration Camps
5. Graduate from college
6. Get a job after college graduation
7. Save at least 1/3 of each paycheck I receive
8. Do something important - something that matters and is selfless
9. Get back in shape
10. Send postcard(s) to Post Secret
11. Make new friends
12. Visit my little sister at Penn State
13. Don't move back in with my parents after graduation
14. Visit Las Vegas
15. Cook more
16. Eat Healthier
17. Learn how to sew
18. Experience a Flash Mob
19. Stop biting my nails
20. Donate money to a good cause
21. Take vitamins every day 
22. Do five things that scares me
23. Learn how to sew (more than just aprons)
24. Finish my Spain scrapbook
25. Wear more "stylish" everyday clothes (not just jeans and t-shirts)
26. Write more handwritten letters
27. Watch at least 10 movies that I haven't seen from AFI's top 100
28. Make this blog worth reading
29. Write a letter to the Glamour magazine editors
30. Win a giveaway on someone else's blog
31. Purge on all the unnecessary things I have in my rooms at my parents' houses
32. Buy an updated digital SLR
33. Have something of mine published in a magazine or newspaper
34. Become fluent in Spanish - I'm advanced, but not fluent
35. Spend more time with my family (sisters, cousins, parents)
36. Go on more photo shoots
37. Learn how to use my digital SLR to it's highest capabilities
38. Use my old manual SLR camera to take more black and white pictures
39. Develop black and white pictures at a photo lab
40. Subscribe to Glamour magazine
41. Develop/purchase a stylish work wardrobe
42. Answer "50 questions that will free your mind"
43. Make cupcakes from scratch
44. Send myself a postcard from every destination I visit
45. Move to a new city/state
46. Transfer more money into my savings account than out
47. Participate in Operation Beautiful
48. Track finances
49. Drink at least 8 glasses of water per day
50. Organize e-mail account
51. Organize iPod - delete unwanted songs
52. Find a personally inspirational quote and work it into a piece of art or home decor
53. Try a new recipe a month, for a year

That's about all I can think of right now. But if you saw item number one on my list, you know that finishing the list is a part of the list! (hehe)

Also, I love Krysten's idea of saving $5 for every item I complete and donating $5 for every item I don't complete, so I am adding that as one of the inspirations for the list.

P.S. If any of you have ideas for me to add to my list, let me know! I always love to hear your input :)